Being a parent is a beautiful and often chaotic adventure—one that Tamara Eldridge knows all too well. As a busy working mom, she is always on the go to keep up with her energetic 5-year-old daughter, Tavia.
Eldridge has learned that creativity and humor are key to navigating the ups and downs of motherhood, and she shares those experiences with other parents through her “Nailed It: Motherhood Podcast.” Eldridge opens up about the joys and challenges of raising a spirited child, balancing work and family life and finding community in the journey of motherhood. She lives with her daughter in Pittsburgh’s East Liberty neighborhood.
As a working single mom with a school-aged daughter, how do you navigate the challenges of balancing work and other responsibilities with family life? What strategies have you found most effective in maintaining that balance?
Balance? What is that? I think I was better at time management before I became a mom, though I had a much fuller calendar. The way I navigate my work life, my parenting life and trying to have a social life is by practicing self-care, being honest with myself and with others about when I need help, creating a schedule that I need to follow (which is still a work in progress for me) and planning outings that will wear my busy daughter out. A lot of those outings have been with friends whose children are around the same age, so we can kill two birds with one stone.
Because of my demanding job, I try to ensure that either I take a break by spending uninterrupted time with my daughter and then doing a highly focused hour or so of work, or by giving my daughter independent project time or screen time while I complete a few tasks. I play that by ear based on my daughter’s energy when I pick her up from school.
You started a parenting podcast a few years back. Why did you decide to start this new venture?
I am someone who believes in gleaning from people who know more than I do and seeing how what they shared can enhance my life. When the idea came, I had been talking with three moms who you would think are amazing and have it all together. They shared some of the deepest feelings and struggles, and I would react, “Wow, I never knew you were going through that. You should share your story.”
The lessons that they learned are lessons that could be applied to many other parents that I know. This prompted me to come up with the tagline, “You might have the recipe that nobody wrote down!” Even if there were a book written, it wouldn’t have all of the answers, but if we shared our stories with others, they might be able to find the answers.
The idea came before the title. I really liked watching the Netflix baking show “Nailed It!” For me, that’s how parenting my daughter felt. I had this intelligent, busy, creative and strong-willed daughter, and I really did not know how to be her mom. If I were on that baking show, I would wrap her in a bow and yell, “This mama is nailing it!” This podcast, for me, is a self-care practice where I can combine sisterhood, notetaking and raising myself as a parent.
What is a recent rewarding moment or experience you have experienced as a parent?
It is always rewarding when I pick my daughter up from school or an activity and an adult tells me how much of a leader she is. She loves to help and behaves so wonderfully (when I’m not around!). Go figure. It does make my heart smile to know that she is listening and will always show up as a good person in this world.
What is your favorite thing to do with your daughter in Pittsburgh?
We had a zoo membership for a couple years. It was nice to just get up and go any time of the year. Now that she is getting older (5 going on 15), she thinks she is supposed to be on play dates 24/7. We like activities that keep us moving, so amusement parks are our thing when the weather is nice. Tavia also seems to have my creative side, so we love to go to pottery places. There is a Black-owned pottery place at the Robinson Mall called Kolor-N-Kiln that we try to get to at least once a year. We also LOVE car singing!
What advice do you have for young parents who are just beginning their parenting journey?
Make mistakes and learn from them! It’s not a question if you will make the mistakes—because you will. The test is how you accept what is necessary for a better outcome. Parenting is an experiment. No matter how good your mom thinks she was as a parent, or your social media neighbor who appears to know all the secrets to parenting, the only way to learn how to parent your child or children is to learn [parenting methods] through trial and error. It can get frustrating, but don’t give up on yourself or your child(ren). ■
Carrie Woodard is a National Certified Counselor, National Certified
School Counselor and a Pittsburgh mama of two.
